A Night in My Cousin’s Room

It’s a really dark night and I’m sitting in my little cousin’s room, watching her sleep and listening to the faint sound produced by the inhalation- exhalation cycle as her bosom rises and falls.

The generators keep up their quarrel just outside, the PHCN peace keepers have as usual, abandoned their outposts, the last time they were sighted being two days ago. I take a quick time check; 2230 and the low glow of the Kerosene lantern illuminates the room. I awake to my sleeping cousin, Edidiong, Six months old who has been with us for the last one week. My lil cousin, Edidiong, is really a beautiful girl, full of excitement, life and superb abilities to keep one awake all night!

She has taught me some great lessons. For instance, one ‘Pampers’ (a diaper brand) is not necessarily equal to one dry night as advertised by Procter & Gamble on Nigerian television, there are other factors that need to be considered. It’s like what Nigerian Telcos do. They’d scream: ‘Load NGN 500 and win a trip to Dubai, NGN 5 million in cash and monthly salary for life’. And just before the advert runs out, they’d add in almost a whisper; ‘Terms and Conditions apply’. So according to lessons I’ve learnt by Edidiong, the Pampers Ad should say: ‘One Pampers is equal to one dry night, all things being equal’ J

Edy could also be very annoying! She sometimes refuses to sleep, crying and causing a huge fussL. There’s this particular special stunt she pulls; she just starts crying for no reason and when you carry her, she just keeps quiet and acts as if nothing occurred. Return her to her cot, and she just resumes the crying stunt for about a minute before she keeps quiet and finally enters into the blissful realm of sleep. Talk about holding the house to ransom without firing a gun!

So sitting at my table this evening and watching my lil cousin sleep, in the darkness that is only partially defeated by the Kerosene lamp and the duels between the generators outside, my mind begins to wander, flying over planes, planets and orbits. I begin to ask myself questions I hope answers would be found for. Taking a cue from Que Sera, I ask, what does the future hold for my lil Cousin? By the time she’s 20, would the generators stop their agbero fighting? Would she school at UNIUYO and have to sit on the floor for a MTH 111 class because the hall was fully filled before the lecture even began? Would she still have hope? Would she believe in God?

Forgive me for my seeming rants, but by July I’d spent 20 years on Earth, all of them in Nigeria and I’ve seen the good, the bad and the ugly. Like the BBC’s Shina Okeleji (@oluwashina) says, ‘…Not every HELLO and HI has ended well though, you just ask the undertaker at a town cemetery’. I’ve learnt to be suspicious, to be skeptical and to be cynical. I’ve crushed the Petals of Blood, shared a Simple Lust, been a Man of the People and ascended to the Path of Thunder. Life has been a teacher, a weird psycho that seemingly defies all attempts of definition and stereotype.

I wish I was Moses, with a miraculous rod, a large heart and an ability to cause water to flow from stones. I wish I was Einstein or Newton, dissecting, propounding and testing scientific hypotheses and laws. I wish I was Okigbo, the voice crying from the groves and holding the world spellbound by its brilliance and technique. But, NO! I’m G Y P S Y, and I’m learning to forgive. I’m the regular dude who just wants to leave the world, my family, my church and my environment better than he met it.

I’m brought back to the reality of the semi-lit room by the sudden death of the one of the generators. The last man standing is performing a solo victory dance. Yeah! He’ll be the last generator to die this night. The weaker combants are taking a deserved break knowing that without the peace-keepers, the duels will resume in the morning. And in my mind, a prayer begins to form, a prayer for my lil cousin.

Edy, may the years be good to you. May you find joy, happiness, faith and hope. May you have a happier first two decades of your life than I’ve had and may God keep you from making costly mistakes and assumptions. May the generators stop quarreling in your lifetime. May those miserable mosquitoes of the night classes not see you and may no idiotic lecturer score you 69.5.

Gotta go now. I’ve got school to ‘pretend to attend’ in the morning. I bow out with the immortal words of Christ:

‘…Greater love hath no man than this, that a man should lay down his life for his friends’

by David "Gypsy" Israel (@Gypsy_C9)